I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Randomize
