You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
How does one acquire holy water?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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