New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
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