You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
Randomize
