I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Randomize
