I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
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