Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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