Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Randomize