Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.