What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Someone came in the potted fern
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
Randomize
