It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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