Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
