i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
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