I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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