Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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