I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
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