Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
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he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
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What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
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