just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
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