tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
