Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize