After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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