Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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