She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
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I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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