At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize