I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
it hurts more in the daytime
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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