..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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