Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
