I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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