Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
how do you say “i know we haven’t hung out in a month, but i gave myself an amazing orgasm to your picture the other day” without coming on too strong
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