Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
Randomize
