Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
15 Things That Could NEVER Happen Anywhere But the South
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
15 Times “Flight of the Conchords” Made You Feel Better About Being a Twenty-Something
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?