Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
my being single is dangerous.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(