would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
