Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
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