better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
Randomize
