It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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