wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize