He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
It's like your tits told gravity 'fuck you, I'm fine right here!'
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
