Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
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