How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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