how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
This is the prime rib incident all over again
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
