The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Not going to make it tonight. Some cougar at the bar just told me she has dibs on my dick.
Randomize