you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize