when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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