You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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