Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Just learned that the cute guy I've been flirting with at the beach this whole time is actually an inmate working in the community instead of being in prison.. My life is unreal
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
