Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Randomize
