I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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