fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
