So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
