how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize