last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
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